LOVE YOUR NATURE
  • Donate
  • Offerings
    • Teen Girls Groups
    • Teen Summer Retreat
    • Teen Workshops >
      • Real Talk Davis
    • Young Women's Online Group
    • Coaching for Teens, Young Adults and Parents
    • Rites of Passage Ceremonies
    • Consulting
  • Us
    • Emily Frost
    • Quetzal Francois
    • Our Team
  • About
    • Our Philosophy
    • Teen Curriculum
    • Media
    • FAQ
    • Praise
  • Connect
    • Contact
    • Calendar
    • Journal
    • Resources

We must learn from those who came before us, and share our stories with those who come after.

When Is It Ever Enough?

9/9/2019

 
Picture
This Summer, I had the honor of attending a retreat for mothers from around the country, as part of a year-long commitment to a Motherworthy group I meet with weekly, online. This was my first trip away from my son Shaye, and my first time to North Carolina. I absolutely loved it! The weekend was relaxed and meaningful, and Shaye did great at home with Dada and Gramma Ummie. I led a simple rite of passage ritual for the group that was as powerful as I'd hoped.
Though I adored tender and silly moments with these incredible women, and swimming naked in a cold river on a true Summer day, my favorite part of the whole adventure was the soundscape of the Appalachian mountains at night. Something about the wet heat, the stars, the woods and creek, and the overpowering symphony of nocturnal singers - it was like retreating to a safe rainforest. I remembered my first conversation with my now husband, when he told me his greatest passion was "listening" (swoon!) and about his interest in finding places in this world where one could listen to an uninterrupted soundscape. It was sweet to remember our "beginning", worlds away.

Departing and still upon return, I find myself in close quarters with grief. Grief about how over-full life is. Grief about finally committing to weaning, of that rushed airport morning being his last "num num" for the rest of his life. Grief about everyone I love aging, and time passing. Grief about how much precious time has been lost to fear, worry, managing. Grief about violence on all levels and the state of the world. I wished to leave all that grief behind, then in classic "Emily" style found myself holding space for others to grieve. Though I left those mountains feeling so, so blessed, I still left with grief close by, like an overly friendly shadow always by my side.

I am lucky enough to...

Picture
I am lucky enough to advise for a wonderful non-profit, Stepping Stones Project, offering rites of passage to middle school aged youth. This past weekend, I led a daylong workshop for their community. During our "Autumn Council" I (not surprisingly) found myself in tears listening to our Elders talk about where they've been, what realms they've traversed in recent seasons. One in particular, is very dear to me. I've been following closely the story of his younger brother's cancer, and this Summer, his brother passed. During the Council, this beloved elder shared a gem I will never forget (in fact I'm posting this on my mirror to read daily!)

Of all the things he could share about his brother dying, he said,
"Love and Grief - they are the same thing." As simple as this seems, it hit the center of my gift/wound story. He went on, "The more we love, the more there is to lose."

Perhaps the greatest risk, is not to abandon life plans and live in a van, finally leave the Bay Area, to have a birthday party for the first time in like 20 years, to have another child, to give up my career, to raise my rates... agh. No. The greatest risk is to lower my standards to love being enough. And not just sort-of-love, except-for-that-one-thing-love. To love with all I've got - and in turn risk the whole structure crumbling around that love, and trust what's left is what's worth living for.

Love is enough... says the over-productive, overachieving, superhero world saving woman-healer-mama telling herself she's just about ready for kid #2. When will anything ever be "enough"?

I'm so grateful to Beth Berry, who led our Motherworthy Retreat in NC, for reminding me with every cell in her ~ to relax, to trust, to welcome, to rest. To forget about "ideally" and "if only" for 2 friggin' days, and let love be enough. What I can tell you is 2 days out of 2 years is definitely not enough!! :-)

Wishing you find your version of "enough" dear ones.

Mama Emily


Comments are closed.

    Author

    EMILY FROST is an artist and mentor working with youth and families in the Bay Area. She is the founder of LOVE YOUR NATURE, a movement devoted to girls and women awakening to their inherent wisdom, power, and purpose.

    Archives

    December 2021
    June 2020
    February 2020
    December 2019
    September 2019
    August 2019
    July 2019
    June 2019
    May 2019
    April 2019
    March 2019
    February 2019
    January 2019
    December 2018
    November 2018
    September 2018
    July 2018
    June 2018
    May 2018
    April 2018
    February 2018
    January 2018
    November 2017
    October 2017
    September 2017
    August 2017
    July 2017
    June 2017
    April 2017
    March 2017
    September 2016
    June 2016
    May 2016

    Categories

    All

    RSS Feed

Picture
Picture
SIGN UP FOR OUR NEWSLETTER

CONNECT@loveyournature.com
510-519-9677
All CONTENT copyright Love Your Nature LLC 2023


Picture
We are a women and queer owned business. We stand with and are committed to serving historically excluded and marginalized families, in particular LGBTQ+ and BIPOC families. We are supported by community, and in turn support our local community. We live and work on unceded Ohlone land. We pay a voluntary land tax in support of Indigenous life. Learn more here.

  • Donate
  • Offerings
    • Teen Girls Groups
    • Teen Summer Retreat
    • Teen Workshops >
      • Real Talk Davis
    • Young Women's Online Group
    • Coaching for Teens, Young Adults and Parents
    • Rites of Passage Ceremonies
    • Consulting
  • Us
    • Emily Frost
    • Quetzal Francois
    • Our Team
  • About
    • Our Philosophy
    • Teen Curriculum
    • Media
    • FAQ
    • Praise
  • Connect
    • Contact
    • Calendar
    • Journal
    • Resources